I have been reading alot of blogs and articles dealing with the subject of moms fighting amongst each other. Some articles deal with breastfeeding vs formula, working moms vs stay at home moms, best way to potty train, best diet for our kids, and on and on and on. There are so many different ways to raise our children. Within these articles and blog posts comes the advice that all mothers should be accepting of each other’s philosophy concerning child rearing. This statement is absolutely true, however this is easier said than done.
All mothers want to be the very best that they can be. We all agonize over our decisions. We hope and pray we have made the right decisions for our little ones. It is hard to read an article that criticizes our decisions and immediately our defenses are up. I myself am guilty of this myself. Recently, a mom asked for advice on having a vaginal birth after 2 c-sections. She was having trouble finding a doctor willing to do this. Most of the responses were recommendations for local doctors, but then there were the moms who reminded her that all births were wonderful and to remember the health of the baby and then there were the moms who reminded her that the birth process was natural and the most healtly for mom and baby! I immediately took offense! I had two c-sections, my first was an emergency (fetal distress) and my second was planned (I was not comfortable with the possible complications). How dare these women say that my birth experience was less special or healthy! And this got me thinking, it is hard not to get upset when someone adamantly opposes your beliefs and what you feel is best for your family.
I understand why moms have such a hard time not fighting amongst ourselves. We feel like we have to defend our decisions. It is hard to remember to respect each other’s decisions and remember that every mom puts alot thought into her decisions. We need to remember there will always be people who believe their way is the only way, no exceptions! We have to try our best to ignore these people and remember there are others who will respect our decisions. We need to try to recognize that we will second guess ourselves after reading certain articles and maybe even change our minds on different issues, but we are all on the same team. Being a mom is hard and we need to support each other!